Sunday, May 3, 2009

What's a number??

Last week I spent a fair amount of time wondering what the repercussions of my upcoming trip to Australia could mean on my adoption. Certainly, there has been a lot of movement on the girls waiting list, and it is conceivable that if the list continues to move this fast, my caseworker will want to call me over the next 3-4 weeks with my own referral. Now, this would be faster than expected, in my opinion, but anything can happen. So... I was trying to get all my ducks in a row and problem solve how to handle this scenario should it occur. What I have ultimately decided to do is -- not worry about it. Bottom line: there is nothing that I can do while I'm away to accept a referred child -- there are some things I could do through phone and email, but there are notarizing of documents that absolutely require me to be in the country to do so. That being said, if I happen to be away, and my agency happens to want to give out a girl referral, they will keep my spot in line and refer the family next in line. The initial thought of that tripped me out -- because, well, that would've been my baby. But, I have always thought the idea of referral was wild anyway. Throughout the entire process of filling out paperwork and depending on how long one element of your dossier took, or if the mail was delayed, you were arbitrarily placed at x number on this list. You could have easily been x+1 or x-1, just because. Also, we are all going to be getting our perfect child, regardless of what number they happen to fall in the lineup -- it is what it is.. everyone talks about numbers... but they are all children looking for their perfect new home. All this being said... my decision may just be a moot point and the movement on the list may just slow down anyway. But, I'm glad I thought it through... I'm totally fine with whatever happens.

Happy Sunday. Hope you're not all recovering from the Swine like myself... not really, I have a cold, but it is fun to throw in the "Swine" and watch people momentarily panic until they realize who they're talking to.

3 comments:

Eastiopians said...

I will gladly hold your #8 status while your away. We can trade numbers if need be. :) In all seriousness, I completely agree that it isn't "the call" that determines who your child is meant to be. Some people have to turn down a referral or some people lose the referral for various reasons...so it's about what child is put in our arms. It is a journey with various twists and turns. I felt certain months ago that CHSFS was the agency that we were supposed to be with, but the road changed and now we are with AGCI with open hearts and minds (and so thankful for it). I know in the end, we will be matched with the child fit for our family. I hope you continue to find such peace in your journey as you continue to do. Have a great week!

Theresa

Adopting1Soon said...

I also have to believe that delays and the ups and downs are all "for a reason", and that I don't know the reason... but it makes it easier to accept.

haze said...

You have a healthy outlook and attitude to this. For starters, you can't put your life on hold during this very unpredictable adoption process. And second, yes - as much as we like to think there is some 'magic' matching us with THE perfect child - we have to be sensible and realize a lot of it is based on paperwork and timing. And no matter what, our children will be perfect for us.